Ouch.
See that there?! Rachel Bilson almost evoked an emotion from me; I’m heartened! Here she is at the Japanese premier of her movie Jumper looking like, uhhh…shit. Listen, on a bad day, she looks about a bajillion times better than me—I pass on the foundation and Crest White Strips too. Honestly, this post isn’t meant to be mean, I’m just super excited she neglected her fondness for the priss-factor enough for me to say something other than snore.
When I converse with baby jesus tonight I’m going to ask for the usual: my boyfriend to tongue kiss another hot dude, my yorkie to speak English at the 6th grade level or higher, my boobs to grow two cup sizes naturally and now, for Rachel Bilson take the next step—an addiction of some sort. She has made the first step by telling her makeup artist to fuck off, now she just needs to tell her handlers to fuck off so she can chug some booze or suck a dick…
*fingers crossed*
P.S. You are demanding fuckers! I do this for fun. I get to take days off. Bite me, go fuck a goat or some other dismissive insult.
I’ll recap what I missed: The Oscars were boring, Janet Jackson might be getting married, Christina Aguilera fired a bunch of people ’cause her baby is boring, Britney’s been on lock-down and Angelina is definitely knocked up again. I love you too.
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