According to shitmag OK! Magazine J-Lo is doing a new reality show on TLC about “juggling” babies as a first time mother and being an A-List celebrity. I’m not even watching that shit, I don’t need to. Here…I’ll sum it up for you:
“Here servant, take lil’ (insert retarded celebrity baby name) and put him down in our gilded nursery on floor 23. I am going to design a new fragrance with jasmine and plumehhhrrria that’ll be a hit in all Carson’s across America. Oh wait, bring back mini-Mark so Annie Lebowitz can photograph him while he’s sleeping; he’s more pleasant that way. This isn’t Fiji water!!!” *throws it against a painting of water lilies that shallow, new-money people would buy*
OSTENTATIOUSLY REDONKULOUS
Editor’s note: Yes, I was looking for the most fucking ridiculous pictures of Jennifer Lopez I could find…However, actually finding them, made me realize I feel a little bad for her future teenaged daughter. She’s gonna love dudes bringing up pics of her mom spreading her legs, wearing see-through shirts and grabbing her ta-ta/crotch simultaneously for da bill$. Crikey. Go-go-J-hoe! You’re extrawhoredinary!
1 response so far ↓
1 CableGirl // Apr 30, 2008 at 5:42 am
Ok, that’s some funny shit. Too true, and too funny.
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