1. I know there’s a good case to be made for Mark Anthony affecting their lil’ Latin babe with his Skeletor gene. But I think JLO hs enough beauty to keep that baby from teetering off the edge of Snake Mountain.
2. Jordan Bratman may have enough Neanderthal to swing that pendulum back towards comeliness. But honestly, worst case, Christina has enough MAC foundation to spackle the suckling for any photo ops.
3. But look, look here! It’s the combined powers of rat-sucked drapery that are Helena Bonham Carter and Tim Burton! Sure to win the most “oooh, he’s got such curly hair!” or “goodness! isn’t he long?!” or “my! what cute little toes!”
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