BORE
GORE
WHORE
Do you think these chicks get bronzer on the toilet paper when they wipe their ass? Not being a total skank myself, I wonder these things. I was watching Dr.90210 the other night and a skeezer (bringin’ it back) bleached her asshole. I don’t know why but it kinda made me wonder: just how fucking thorough are these poor messes? Do they bronzer and glitter all the way to their assholes? Do they stop at their pantie line? Where does the make up end?
If they’re putting on so many false eyelashes so as to impair-their-vision, where is “too much?” See, I understand the preference for wearing makeup but when it’s applied with a spatula, out of bucket, it kind of defeats the purpose. It’s completely nonsensical; like when you see a cigarette butt with lipstick on it.
8 responses so far ↓
1 schmallison // Oct 8, 2008 at 10:21 am
I don’t even know who the last one is, but she clearly puts on her makeup by applying shoe-polish to the eyepieces of some binoculars and then looking through them.
2 Frothy Afterbirth // Oct 8, 2008 at 2:39 pm
For some reason my asshole got all tingly when anal bleaching got mentioned.
3 Captain Obvious // Oct 8, 2008 at 4:57 pm
I’m not sure I understand the method behind asshole bleaching. It’s not like some guy is going to be railing her doggie-style and look down and think it’s something else. It’s an asshole…we know what it’s for.
Guy’s aren’t that easy to fool.
4 hotcakesandflapjacks // Oct 9, 2008 at 9:18 am
I think they sparkle their va-jay-jays. I know a hot mess who wakes up before her husband so she can out make-up on. These women are so wrapped up in their image that I’m pretty sure they consider the un-bronzed, de-eyelashed women strangers in the mirror.
but the third one is Aubrey O’Day and I’d hit totes do-os her.
5 schmallison // Oct 9, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Maybe they apply the sparkle powder everywhere so that they leave a trail of glitter around town. That way, they can find their way home whey they’re all coked out and drunk!
6 schmallison // Oct 9, 2008 at 2:18 pm
when*
7 hotcakesandflapjacks // Oct 9, 2008 at 4:48 pm
No, I think the glitter is there to distract you from their broke-down coke noses and meth faces. And their wonk-ass tit jobs. and their streaky self-tanner applied hurriedly in the bathroom of their latest john, oops, I mean beau. Lets not forget that they need to draw the eye away from the stringy extensions and self-imposed eyeliner debacles.
Also, if we viewed it another way
1. Heidi
2. Aubrey O’Day
3. Jody Marsh (right?)
it’s kinda like the progression a blonde ho goes through in hollywood. Relatively clean in the beginning, all out ho-dom at the end.
8 schmallison // Oct 10, 2008 at 8:52 am
Personally, I like to sprinkle glitter on everything I eat…It makes my dookie twinkle!
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